Yoga and Eating Disorder – The Other Side?

Recently, I’ve found myself reading a lot of discourse about yoga and body identity – including eating disorders.  For the most part, when it is directly addressed, the focus seems to be on the ways in which yoga can aid in the recovery from eating disorder.  There are even much cited studies from 2005 and 2009 that show a “scientific” connection between doing yoga and recovery from E.D.  But, I want to just trouble that conclusion for a moment.  I’ve written in the past about how yoga can operate as a positive force in combating body issues, including eating disorder.  And, I don’t want this to be perceived as a “taking back” of that point, but I think that the crucial word here is can.  Yoga can assist in eating disorder recovery.  But, that doesn’t mean it will and it doesn’t make it a cure.

Before I go on, let me be clear here about what I mean by eating disorder.  From my perspective, and based on my own scholarly work regarding the issues, I elect to operate from a definition that is not based primarily on body size/shape, nor on official diagnosis.  From my viewpoint, having a weight that is higher than the currently accepted social norm is not an eating disorder.  Having a weight that is lower than the currently accepted social norm is not an eating disorder.  An individual can have a perfectly “normal” weight and still have a disordered relationship with food and the body.  And, from my view, “eating disordered” isn’t about an official diagnosis of anorexia, bulimia, compulsive overeating, etc.  In fact, I would argue that most people in the U.S., and probably even a  higher percentage of women, have a disordered relationship with food.  I see it as a continuum.  On one end would be a perfectly healthy relationship with food.  On the other end would be a totally destructive relationship with food.  Few people are at either end of the continuum.  Most of us are in the middle somewhere.  This means that there isn’t a specific cut-off where we can say that someone has leapt over the barrier from healthy to unhealthy relationship with food.  This being my belief, functionally I tend to define eating disorder as a state in which the relationship with food significantly negatively impacts other parts of the individual’s life.  Those other parts can include other relationships, physical health, emotional well-being, occupation, school success, etc.   So, that’s where I’m coming from.

Looking at it from this standpoint, I can see, and have seen in my own life, how developing a more yogic mindset can assist in E.D. recovery (moving toward that perfectly healthy end of the continuum).  Such a mindset encourages us to see the unity between self and other, to value the self in a different way, to see the body as both less and more important (less important in appearance, more important in the need to maintain its health so that we can work on the other issues), to let go of our attachments/aversions (to food, to fat, to being thin, and so on).  But, and this is an important but, that is about really having that yoga philosophy and having it resonate through the whole worldview.  And that isn’t what yoga ends up being always.

In the U.S. (and I’m not saying it isn’t this way other places – I just don’t live there), yoga often is understood to mean primarily or only the physical practice.  And, I don’t just mean by people who don’t regularly do yoga.  I still find myself thinking “no yoga today” when I mean no asana.  And, therein lies the rub – or one of them.  If yoga is mostly about the physical, it not only might not reduce eating disordered behavior/thoughts, it may increase them.  This is the yoga that makes curvy yogis say that they feel disenfranchised by studios, yoga organizations, and yoga publications.  This is the yoga that leads to contests that seem to be primarily about appearance.  This is the  yoga that promotes the notion that a yoga body should look like X.  And all of these beliefs are contributory to the perceptions of reality that create eating disorder.

But, it doesn’t end there.  Even when yoga is understood as going beyond the physical, there are beliefs and understandings floating around in yoga-land that can be problematic for recovery.  What serious student of yoga has not heard stories of ______ (great guru of choice) who only consumed 1 ________ (fruit, vegetable) a day because he/she was so beyond the needs of the physical body?  There are a lot of these legends in the yoga culture.   That’s dangerous, because “I don’t need food at all” and “If I don’t eat, I will be a better person” sound an awful lot like anorexic  thoughts.   The competitiveness that has  become a part of yoga culture is another issue.  There is no denying the pervasiveness of the “x style is better than y,”  “x guru is better than y guru,”  “so-and-so is a more real yoga practice than such and such” that goes on.  Maybe it shouldn’t be there, but it is.   Is it surprising that this might contribute to an eating disordered worldview that is already based on preoccupation with being more-than or less-than, better-than or worse-than?

So, yeah.  I don’t really have some big pronouncement to end with here.  I guess my point is that, before we wander around patting our own backs (ha ha, yoga joke) about how good yoga is for treatment of eating disorders, let’s take the time to recognize the ways in which the yoga culture we have created can be contributory as well.  If yoga is about unity, let’s understand that “yoga” isn’t all good, any more than it is all bad.  It just is.

Namaste,

L

p.s. While I fully respect how the revelation of detailed personal battles with eating disorder can be useful to speaker and audience, I have elected not to do that here, not as a condemnation of anyone else’s choices, but just because of where I am right now.

p.p.s.  I had a very hard time selecting an image for this post without it appearing that I was being overly critical of one particular person or establishment or presenting images that might be bad triggers.  So, this boring fork was the result of that debate.

But, Where is My Normal Teacher?

When we were young, in early elementary school, having a substitute teacher was a little unnerving.  We knew the regular teacher; we had certain expectations of her/him.  We probably felt safe in his/her classroom and with the way that things were managed there.  Later, in middle school and high school, we started to like having a substitute teacher, because it often meant that no work would be getting done, assignments/tests would be put off, and some of the kids would misbehave in (possibly) entertaining ways – with very little consequence.

In the yoga classroom, from what I can tell, most of us return to that early school frame of mind.  As I consider my own reaction to finding a substitute in my classes, and what I see on the faces of other students (when I’m sharing the class with them, or when I am the substitute), it seems that having an unexpected yoga instructor creates concern and possibly even annoyance.  I know that I have thought to myself, “but I came today specifically to take a class with ________,”  or “I hope that this class isn’t more/less challenging (or zen or calming or fun) than __________’s class.”  When I took over a class a few weeks ago, about 50% of the students who entered asked, with some fear and stress in their voices, “Where is ________?  Will he be back next week?”

It’s perfectly reasonable, because teaching styles can vary so widely in a way that goes beyond just what sort of language is used (is this teacher more anatomical or more metaphorical?), whether there is chanting, what kind of music is played, or whether there is more/less demonstration of poses.  In a class that is labeled as vinyasa, for example, one teacher may have more of an ashtanga influence, while another may be more influenced by anusara, and a third Iyengar.  Even for teachers who ostensibly teach the exact same style, the lineage of learning impacts how that style unfolds in a class session.  Those are differences that make a difference to a student in the room.  The first time I encountered a class that did not begin with sun salutations of some sort, I was completely confused.  I didn’t know where we were going and I didn’t feel settled in the class.  It’s normal to feel a little thrown.  We do select particular classes and instructors because the style suits our individual needs.  Sure, some of it is about the time of day and the location of the studio, but if the class doesn’t fit for us, we aren’t likely to keep going back.  A substitute can feel like a wrench in the gears.

However, while having a sub in class can be a little unnerving, it’s also an amazing opportunity.  We don’t always find the time to go try out other classes.  Once we find a few that feel ok, it’s easy enough to just stick to them without exposing ourselves to the full range of selections.  Having a substitute instructor brings that diversity of selection to us, instead of us needing to go seek it out.  We can check out another way of practicing and another style of teaching while remaining in our comfortable time and place.  Having a different teacher in class may also draw our attention more firmly to the mat.  If we are really accustomed to a particular instructor’s style, we may feel like we can predict what is coming next in a practice, and that might allow the mind to wander a bit more.  A new teacher in the room requires full attention to follow along.  Last, but not least, having a substitute instructor is an excellent chance to work our equanimity.  Can we maintain our focus on what brings us to yoga in the first place and avoid thinking about how different this teacher is, or that she seems louder (or quieter or more nervous or more bold) than our usual instructor?  Can we let go of the critical chatter that might come up (“If that Lorin says ‘your edge’ one more time, I might lose my mind!”  “Why in the world are we holding utkatasana so long?!”) and embrace our own unity with the substitute?  After all, we’re all there from a love for yoga.

Like most everything, having a different yoga teacher from the one you anticipated can be a challenge, but it’s also a chance to grow and learn.  In the end, we may conclude that the alternate teacher’s style just isn’t for us, that it is amazing and we can’t wait to take another class with him/her, or something in between.  But, regardless, the experience has value if we remain open to it.

Namaste,

L

Get Down, Yogi – Yogi, Get Down!

I’ve been making a lot of playlists for class lately.  Sometimes it’s easy, and sometimes less so.  It’s more of a challenge when there is a theme I’m going for, or when the class is yin, gentle, or something where I feel there is a little less latitude.  But, hearing about other people’s playlists is very helpful for me, so I’ve posted a couple here and will continue to do so.   Recent additions include:

Ska Playlist (90 minute vinyasa)

Gone You Down – Steady Ups
Prayer to Jah – The Gladiators
Judge Not – Bob Marley and the Wailers
Precipice – King Django
Time of the Season – The Scofflaws
Speak Your Mind – The Toasters
Simmer Down – Bob Marley and the Wailers
Guns of Navarone – The Skatalites
Sufferer – The Selecter
Rudie Can’t Fail – The Clash
One Step Beyond – Madness
Two Tone Army – Toasters
Free Nelson Mandela – The Specials
Moonstomp 97 – The Skoidats
Buttah – New York Ska Jazz Ensemble
Basement Ska – Chris Murray
Sooner or Later – The Slackers
Stand Down Margaret – English Beat
Old Dog – The Slackers
Mama Used to Say – Hepcat

Aparigraha Playlist (90 minute vinyasa)

Man of Constant Sorrow (Instrumental) – Soundtrack version
Charlie Darwin – The Low Anthem
Where the Streets have no Name – Earl Pickens and Family
Ill with Want – The Avett Brothers
Everybody Hurts – REM
Timshel – Mumford & Sons
When My Time Comes – Dawes
Hang On – Dr. Dog
Carries On – Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros
Across the Universe – The Beatles
Let it Grow – Eric Clapton
What Light – Wilco
Life is Wonderful – Jason Mraz
Quiet – Paul Simon
Be Here Now – Ray Lamontagne
Om Mani Padme Hum 3 – Jane Winther
Watermark – Enya

Jazz Playlist (90 minute yin)

Sherpa – Bela Fleck & the Flecktones
Reminiscence – Bela Fleck and the Flecktones
Shanti – Bela Fleck and the Flecktones
Goodbye Pork Pike Hat – Charles Mingus
Blues to Elvin – John Coltrane
Misterioso – Marcus Roberts
Freddie Freeloader – Miles Davis
Take Five – Dave Brubeck
Blues for Gordon – Bela Fleck and the Flecktones
Mood Indigo – Marcus Roberts
Cast Your Fate to the Wind – Vince Guaraldi
Sunset Road – Bela Fleck and the Flecktones
Blue in Green – Miles Davis
It Never Entered My Mind – Miles Davis

Soul Playlist (90 minute yin)

Behave Yourself    Booker T. & the MG’s
Come to Me    Otis Redding
A Fool For You    Ray Charles
I Can’t Stand the Rain    Angeline Ball
My Sweet Potato    Booker T. & the MG’s
I’m Glad to Do It    C.L. Blast
These Arms of MIne – Otis Redding
Green Onions    Booker T. & the MG’s
100 Days, 100 Nights    Sharon Jones & The Dap-Kings
Spunky    Johnny Jenkins    Johnny Jenkins
Burnt Biscuits    The Triumphs
Hold On! I’m Comin’    Sam & Dave
Mo’ Onions    Booker T. & the MG’s
Tell Me    Sharon Jones & The Dap-Kings
Unchain My Heart    Ray Charles
Morning After    The Mar-Keys
I’ve Got A Woman    Ray Charles
Steppin’ Right Along    Bill Withers
Humble Me    Sharon Jones & The Dap-Kings
Grandma’s Hands    Bill Withers
Comfort Me    Carla Thomas
That’s How Strong My Love Is    Otis Redding
I’ll Always Have Faith in You    Carla Thomas
Groovin’    Booker T. & the MG’s
Winter Snow    Booker T. & the MG’s
Mellow Mood, Pt. 1    Barry White

What are some of your favorites, for what kind of class, and why?

L