Wednesday morning (when I wrote this) was my first Vinyasa class after officially beginning yoga teacher training. The funny thing was, it actually felt a little bit different, but not in the way that I expected. I had wondered if I would be able to keep my attention in the moment during class, or if I would be constantly analyzing it in terms of teacher training and my own future classes. Interestingly, that wasn’t a problem and wasn’t the difference I felt. Instead, I think I felt more “in that place” than I usually do in a class.
I don’t know if this was just a happy coincidence or related to starting training, but it was an excellent class for me, and not because I was so great at things (harkening back to my previous admissions of competition/perfection). In every pose, I just felt perfectly fine and happy being in that pose. There was no wondering when it would be over or how I was doing in comparison to others. There was no self-critique. It was delightful!
So, what did I learn? Well, I’m not sure, as I don’t know if I somehow did this or it just happened randomly. But, I definitely reaffirmed for myself that, if I can really stay present in class, the experience feels so much better (in a whole being way – even if some poses are still painful for my joints) than it does when I am allowing my brain to crowd out the moment I am experiencing.
And, that’s something, right?